Christmas and the holiday season will be very different for many people this year thanks to restrictions in place by the pandemic. Pixabay photo

Christmas and the holiday season will be very different for many people this year thanks to restrictions in place by the pandemic. Pixabay photo

‘This too shall pass:’ B.C. residents work through loss of holiday gatherings, traditions

Finding ways to manage and process the changes COVID-19 presents to seasonal plans

It won’t be the same, but it’s the right decision.

For Elizabeth Young, pandemic restrictions mean a new Christmas reality of not seeing her parents — something many B.C. residents will experience this year.

What makes it particularly difficult, however, for the Courtenay resident is that her father, who lives in Victoria, has just finished cancer treatments and can’t talk on the phone very well. She’s taking a step back navigating the new reality of what the holidays will look like this year, but also accepting what the change will bring.

“…It’s also a bit of a relief to not have to worry about travelling and co-ordinating visits – what if the weather gets bad and things like that? After all the stress and uncertainty this year, I’m actually looking forward to just spending a few extra days at home to rest.”

RELATED: Loneliness taking toll on Canadian mental health in COVID era, study finds

RELATED: B.C. seniors worry more about death from loneliness than COVID-19

Young had the opportunity to visit her family before the provincial travel restrictions were put into place, and she’s looking forward to heading to the south Island for a visit once restrictions are lifted.

“We’ll FaceTime on Christmas so I can see my parents, my sister, brother-in-law and my niece and nephew. It won’t be the same, but it actually feels like the right decision for all of us.”

For those at some of the B.C.’s care homes, the holidays will be focused on finding and creating joy within. Jolene Shaw, community relations manager at Berwick Comox Valley Retirement Community admitted while the year has been difficult, their team is making the best of the situation for their residents.

“We are in the company of people that have endured much in their lives, including world wars. This too shall pass.”

To make Christmas at the Berwick extra special, Shaw explained they are planning to take their residents to Hawaii – or rather – to bring Hawaii to them.

They creating plane tickets and are planning a celebration on Dec. 17 alongside ‘flight attendants’ who will meet residents at the dining room and will offer them a small snack and drink once everyone has gone through ‘flight safety protocol.’ An ‘inflight’ Hawaiian meal alongside hula entertainment will follow, and Santa will join at the conclusion of the meal.

At another care home, Glacier View Lodge, designated visitors are allowed through their COVID-19 protocols, but visits are done in a careful way, noted Liz Friis, director of resident lifestyle and community programs. While activities in past years such as choir and musical performances can’t happen in the same way, staff are finding ways to make events work. Various groups are set to sing outside the lodge while staying socially distant and keeping to their respective bubbles.

“Some visitors can’t come in, so we have lots of options such as a microphone space, a window and we can do FaceTime or the phone.”

The new reality restricting gathering and travel combined with the usual stress of the holidays is making the loss of traditional celebrations “really tangible and undeniable” explained Caroline Bradfield, a registered clinical counsellor with Comox Valley Counselling.

She said the reduced connections to other people along with the lack of traditional rituals and ceremonies this year is adding to a growing sense of overall loss. It’s an emotion our culture has a tendency to move past quickly without spending time processing.

“We have a way of dismissing our own pain and losses; we minimize and ignore it. When we think about humans coping and our stress, humans cope in a couple of different ways. We either over-react and make ourselves too busy or we under-react and isolate and check-out.”

She said humans love to problem solve, and while it is an amazing characteristic, it can also lead to trouble as not all problems are solvable, such as some grief, loss or change.

Sometimes the best way to work through the emotion is to find “someone there in our corner” who will truly listen, validate feelings and empathize.

“If we can listen, and be there with them and not try to fix the losses is a huge part of healing for healing in solidarity. Understanding validates feelings, and it makes us not feel so alone. Loneliness is so crushing; it puts us in a place of helplessness and hopelessness and humans don’t do well in that realm.

“Just to have someone there to turn to is really helpful.”

Looking for places to turn for help? Call the BC Mental Health Support Line (no area code needed): 310-6789; it’s free and available 24 hours a day. The Suicide Hotline is available if you are in distress or worried about someone else; it is free and available 24 hours a day: 1-800-784-2433.

For more news from Vancouver Island and beyond delivered daily into your inbox, please click here.



photos@comoxvalleyrecord.com

Like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter

Get local stories you won't find anywhere else right to your inbox.
Sign up here

Just Posted

Jaimie Davis won received a Northwest Community College President’s Art Award in 2018. This year, she won the Best Solopreneur Award from Small Business BC for her online shop Jada Creations. (Contributed photo/Northwest Community College)
Terrace artist wins provincial small business award

Jaimie Davis of Jada Creations won BC Small Business’ Best Solopreneur Award

Chera Bergen (left) with her sisters Hali and Dylan Ouellet (not in the picture) raised money through a bottle drive in Terrace to buy essential supplies for a homeless shelter. (Binny Paul/ Terrace Standard)
Terrace sisters’ recycle drive raises money for homeless shelter

With the $1175 raised, Chera, Hali and Dylan bought essential supplies for Ksan Society

A memorial march takes place along Highway 16 also known as Canada’s ‘Highway of Tears’ on national day of awareness of Murdered & Missing Indigenous Women and Girls (MMIWG). Over five dozen people from nearby communities joined the march which began outside Terrace City Hall and ended at the memorial totem pole erected along Hwy 16, near Kitsumkalum. (Binny Paul/Terrace Standard)
‘City of Terrace can and should make spaces safer’: MMIWG activists

Activists called on governments to amplify safety net for women on national day of awareness of MMIWG

RCMP are reminding the public to be aware of their surroundings after a stabbing sent a man to hospital on May 4, 2021. (Black Press Media File Photo)
Terrace stabbing sends man to hospital

RCMP remind the public to be aware of surroundings

The construction site for the new Mills Memorial Hospital has been cleared. (Binny Paul/The Terrace Standard)
Bird nests key to decision to log hospital site in Terrace

Nests would have posed a risk of increasing costs

Protesters attempt to stop clear-cutting of old-growth trees in Fairy Creek near Port Renfrew. (Will O’Connell photo)
VIDEO: Workers, activists clash at site of Vancouver Island logging operation

Forest license holders asking for independent investigation into incident

Provincial health officer Dr. Bonnie Henry and Health Minister Adrian Dix update B.C.’s COVID-19 situation at the B.C. legislature, April 29, 2021. (B.C. government)
B.C.’s COVID-19 case count creeps up, seven more deaths

445 people in hospital, 157 in intensive care

Summerland’s positive test rate is much higher than surrounding local health areas, according to internal BC CDC documents. (BC CDC)
Summerland third behind Surrey, Abbotsford in daily per capita COVID-19 cases

Interior Health is rolling out additional vaccine availability to the community

Amazon is pausing its Prime Day marketing event in Canada this year amid ongoing COVID-19 outbreaks at its facilities in Ontario. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Nathan Denette
Amazon Prime Day halted in Canada due to COVID-19 outbreaks in warehouses

The postponement of the event was put in place to protect the health and safety of employees and customers, the company says

Ally Thomas, 12, seen in an undated family handout photo, died on April 14 from a suspected overdose. Her family says they are frustrated more public supports weren't available when they tried to get her help. THE CANADIAN PRESS
Minister says suspected overdose death of 12-year-old pushing B.C. to ‘do better’

Minister Sheila Malcolmson of Mental Health and Addictions says the government is working ‘as hard as we can’ to build a system of care for youths

At this Highway 3 check point, police officers will be asking for identification from drivers, documentation regarding the driver’s name and address, and the purpose for the driver’s travel. (RCMP)
No fines handed out at 1st COVID-19 roadblock as checks move across B.C.

Cpl. Chris Manseau says a total of 127 vehicles were stopped at a roadblock in the Manning Park area

A spectator looks on as the Olympic Caldron is relit in downtown Vancouver, Wednesday, February 12, 2020. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Jonathan Hayward
Small majority of B.C. residents in favour of a Vancouver 2030 Olympic bid: survey

A new survey shows a split over the possibility of public money being spent to organize and host the winter games

Junior A team Coquitlam Express is offering all Tri-City residents who get vaccinated against COVID-19 a free ticket to one of their games. (Facebook/Coquitlam Express)
B.C. hockey team offering free tickets to hometown fans who get the COVID-19 vaccine

‘We know the only way to get fans back is people getting vaccinated,’ says Express’ general manager Tali Campbell

Jobs Minister Ravi Kahlon speaks in the B.C. legislature, describing work underway to make a small business and tourism aid package less restrictive, Dec. 10, 2020. (Hansard TV)
B.C.’s latest COVID-19 restrictions cost thousands of service jobs

Part-time workers set back again by spike in virus spread

Most Read