It has come to my attention that Terrace bicyclists are shamelessly exploiting the very roads designed for our cars and trucks for free!
As a result, Terrace bicyclists are not paying their fair share of exorbitant Canadian gas taxes, not coughing up for BC’s monopoly-based car insurance, or crying over the high-cost of vehicle repairs (including GST of course).
For bicyclists, no driver’s licence is required, and they contribute nothing towards our righteous carbon tax (while any fool can see all the carbon dioxide they breathe out…). Finally, car manufacturers are being deprived of needed sales and associated depreciation, to say nothing of required maintenance.
Damn it, this just isn’t fair.
And worse, those darn bicyclists look so happy pedalling around, they must be on something. RCMP, why aren’t you doing roadside bike breathalysers, collecting blood samples or something to figure out what substances these people are on?
What I propose is a long overdue government intervention for these free-loaders:
– Bicycle Driver’s licence, annual licence fees/plate, and insurance for bikes, just like cars;
– A carbon tax based on miles ridden (will require tamper-proof odometers for bikes of course);
– A health tax to cover additional pension benefits from this abnormally healthy life-style;
– A GST surcharge on bikes, based on the average GST for new car purchase;
– And finally, a happiness tax for just being too darn happy.
Let’s get bicyclists back behind the wheels of those 2½-ton trucks.
Be Canadian for heaven’s sake.